My Cruddy Day
by teh 4th freakee fairet
Summary: An accident befalls JD and, due to his condition, only Dr. Cox can help him! Will Dr. Cox get over his pride and help someone he actually cares about? And even if he does, will JD ever be able to get his life back to normal? [CoxJD, obviously slash]
1. Stupid Bike

**well, here it is, i suppose. enjoy!**

**Summary: **An accident befalls JD, and though all his basic memories like speaking, counting and even his ability as a doctor remains, all but one personal memory is lost, and only Dr. Cox can help him! Will JD ever be able to function properly again? Will he even ever remember who he is? And what's this rivalry between Cox and Turk[CoxJD

**Rating:** Um, I think it's rated T for now because of the blood, but since it's a CoxJD fanfic, who knows? Maybe I might have to bump up the rating later ...

Regular text.

"Speaking."

_Thinking_.

(Author's notes within story.)

* * *

My Cruddy Day

_Chapter One: Stupid Bike..._

JD clambered off his bike awkwardly, hopping on one foot as he tried to pull his leg over. After a second of regrouping, he removed his helmet and chained his bike to the rack, knowing _very _well that there were certain people that would steal and/or destroy his bike without batting an eye.

Unbeknownst to the young doctor, amid the somewhat chaotic looking ramp, stairs and bushes at the front door, was an orange electrical cable winding through the sliding doors, under the railing of the ramp and in and out the bars of the bike rack. Beyond that, it was lost under and around the cars parked at the hospital's front.

As JD stepped back, he set his foot right at the heart of a coil of this orange cable when it suddenly yanked back, rose up his ankle then knocked his leg right out from under him. Someone seemed to be pulling it from behind the parked van, not twenty feet away.

A lurch of fear tightened in JD's stomach. He was falling forward and there was no question about whether or not he could stop himself; he was already off-balance and incredibly clumsy as it is. JD's other knee buckled at the sudden weight shift and, being two or three feet away from the bike rack he'd just tied his bike too, cracked his skull against the metal arm that extended on either side of it.

There was white flame of agony that washed over his eyes then a vast darkness that he was instantly lost in. In reality, though, JD fell like a deadweight to the ground, his eyes closed lightly, a puddle of blood forming from an unseen break in the skin, hidden by dark hair.

This all taking place in under five seconds, the puller was completely unaware of what had caught the cord or what had befallen the unsuspecting JD. It was the Janitor who stood up, confused, with the resistant cord, wrapped around JD's ankle, still refusing to come any closer. Janitor dropped what he had coiled up so far and went around the back of his gray van to see JD motionless beside the bike rack.

The first emotion the Janitor felt surprisingly enough was alarm. He'd never liked the kid, and he probably wouldn't ever, but he never meant to really hurt, much less kill, anyone. Immediately, he fell to a knee beside JD, roughly shaking his shoulder.

"Hey, kid?! Can you hear me?" Janitor barked almost fearfully, By now, another just-arriving hospital employee had arrived at the scene. The scrawny intern jumped at the sight of a man out cold in a pool of blood at the hospital's doorsteps and there was a flurry of action.

Within moments, doctors were rushing out, a stretcher was being rolled down the ramp and several people were shouting orders at each other. The seemingly-innocent orange cable was shaken off and before long, JD was inside the building, still oblivious to it all.

Dr. Cox was in doctor mode after receiving the message on his pager. He arrived in one section of the emergency room to already find the man he'd been called to help, being transferred from rolling stretcher to hospital bed. Several nurses and doctors were swarmed over him, machines being started and hooked up. A tube was pushed down his airway, apparently, since he was unable to breathe without assistance.

That was the first thing that ticked Dr. Cox off that this was serious. He had yet to get a good look at this smaller, younger-looking man's face but it mattered very little as he pushed his way in, his mind already firing off at what to do next. With those disposable, latex gloves pulled on and stethoscope bouncing against his chest, Dr. Cox began a routine but rapid check of all vital signs to get his footing in the situation. Someone beside him glanced up for direction as a heart monitor started giving a shrill, rapid beep.

"What've we got so far?" Dr. Cox demanded.

The blue-scrubbed woman beside him was already reeling off the list, "Apparently trauma to the right side of the head, one laceration, no skull puncturing, but he hit the ground hard."

Dr. Cox didn't need for her to continue. _So this poor sap's brain's've been rattled around and he'll be lucky to come out of this the same way he came in_, the experienced doctor thought grimly as medical supplies went this way and that. The rapid blood flow from the wound had been staunched and there was already an IV drip sending a steady flow of drugs to resettle his heart since his brain had given out disrupted and unclear messages upon hitting the bike rack.

It was then that the immediate panic was calmed. This patient's heart was steady once more, there were no obstructions in his airway and they were finally in control of the situation. As everyone took a step back, Dr. Cox finally grasped the thought that'd been nagging him as since he'd arrived on the scene.

Laying motionless before him, unable to breath or help himself in anyway, was his protégé, JD.

At that momentm Carla appeared, whose shift had began before Elliot's, JD's or Turk's, and the tray she'd been gripping clattered to the ground as she passed her friend's hospital bed.

"_JD?!_" she gasped in shock, her face contorted with fear and confusion. "Dr. Cox, what happened to him?" Carla added as she swooped forward to gently touch his pale, seemingly paler than before, face with her finger tips. At a loss for words, Dr. Cox stared silently, his hands already peeling the gloves off out of habit. Then suddenly his voice came back, his mouth was no longer dry and a furious look spread over his brow.

"I don't know, but I sure as hell am going to find out," he growled, almost snarled, as he whipped out of the room to locate that female doctor he'd spoken to moments ago. Then he barked over his shoulder agitatedly, only the tremor in his tone giving away his anxiety, "You should probably call his little girlfriends now that they've gotten him to a safer place for the moment, alright?"

It didn't take long for him to find her, Dr. Moore, he thought, speaking to a very shaken Janitor in the lobby. She was holding a clipboard and jotting something down very quickly as the man spoke indistinctly. Dr. Cox growled and stomped towards them. He very well knew that the Janitor had it in for JD and his gut told him that he was behind this. But as Dr. Cox came closer, he saw the shocked look on the Janitor's face. Dr. Moore glanced up, knowing Dr. Cox was JD's mentor and had a fiery attitude, and looked away.

"What did you do?" the doctor demanded, after tapping his nose and crossing his arms. Guilt flashed in the Janitor's eyes. Dr. Cox looked surprised at this and something told him that maybe whatever happened, hadn't been on purpose.

Dr. Moore stepped back, wondering whether or not she should show him the notes she had taken, which were required for records in all emergency injuries. But, according to the death glare in his eyes, Dr. Cox looked determined to get the word from Janitor's mouth.

Janitor glanced up guiltily. "Look, I've never really liked the kid-"

"Yep, that's an un-incriminating way to start," Dr. Cox cut in.

After a quick glare, Janitor rolled on, "I never really liked him but I couldn't see him from the other side of the van. I was just putting some cable up, it was caught on his foot and it pulled him down." He avoided saying that he _himself _pulled JD down, resulting in him smashing his head on the bike rack, but the Janitor did put in that he did see JD ride by on his bike.

There was a momentary silence from Dr. Cox, but suddenly he growled and whipped away, knowing that he couldn't blame Jumpsuit for it. Not watching where his feet were taking him, Dr. Cox found himself back in the emergency ward.

JD's hair was pushed back and there was an oxygen mask obscuring his face. He was also still in street clothes, his jacket and shirt front cut open so tubes and wires and whatnot could reach his chest. Dr. Cox couldn't help wondering if he would be his girly self and wake up whining about that. Then his thoughts turned darker, as he wondered if he'd wake up at all, and if he did, would he be the same?

Suddenly, he shook his head and snatched up the charts from the side of the bed and flipped through the pages there. JD was scheduled for a CT scanning within the next hour. Until then, though, it seemed JD was to sit there and be monitored. He had yet to show any changes, positive or negative, meaning that he was still not asleep but unconscious, unresponsive so the extent of his head injury was unknown.

_Maybe if, no, _when_, Emma here wakes up, she'll be just fine, _Dr. Cox said to himself, thwarting his doctor side of thinking as he went. He noticed as nurses went by, one or two of them would look up and recognize JD, gasp and dash off. The news had already spread though the hospital like wild fire and Dr. Cox was well aware of the people staring at his back constantly. Whenever he whipped around to snarl, though, they'd all scattered away.

With dark thoughts of what could have befallen JD, Dr. Cox stormed away to bury himself in busy work.

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**yay, my sad first attempt at fanfiction ever. i've always wanted to write this story; the idea's been bugging me for weeks. there is another chapter coming though! i do plan on something here happening.**


	2. Is He?

**so, i have a bazillion hits and, like, three reviews. that's a little surprising. anyways, here's chapter two. yay!**

**Summary: **An accident befalls JD, and though all his basic memories like speaking, counting and even his ability as a doctor remains, all but one personal memory is lost, and only Dr. Cox can help him! Will JD ever be able to function properly again? Will he even ever remember who he is? And what's this rivalry between Cox and Turk [CoxJD

**Rating:** Um, I think it's rated T for now because of the blood, but since it's a CoxJD fanfic, who knows? Maybe I might have to bump up the rating later ...

Regular text.

"Speaking."

_Thinking._

(Author's notes within story.)

_

* * *

_

_Chapter Two: Is He ... ?_

The CT scan came back showing damage to the brain that spread over about 15 of the surface of the cerebrum, with some damage on the deeper sections. It was hesitantly given to Newbie's little group, with Dr. Cox tagging out of 'morbid curiosity', according to him. Only Carla had the guts to laugh and say, "Yeah, right."

It was hesitantly given because the damage done could very well leave JD in a coma, or if he woke up any time soon, completely different. Then, even if he was normal when he woke up, there would be headaches, memory loss and 'dizzy spells' for days, weeks, or months afterwards.

Elliot was just over a bout of tears and Turk had been stony silent, in shock, since receiving the news. It was simply unbelievable that two hours ago, JD had been perky and on his way to work and now he could be literally dead.

Everyone had spent as much time bearable at his bedside, now that he'd been moved to a room and changed into a patient's gown, blanket pulled up to his waist. His hair even still had products in it from earlier that morning. One by one, Carla, Turk and Elliot had filed out the room, undoubtedly going to be distracted that whole day.

It was a little while later as Dr. Cox 'coincidently' passed, he took the opportunity to step into Newbie's room when suddenly, things went wrong.

Behind his closed eyelids, JD's eyes rolled as his muscles suddenly began contracting. Dr. Cox recognized it immediately. Seizures often accompanied brain injuries. The elder doctor swooped forward, paging the nurse as he went, snatching a vial of Diazepam, which had been brought just in case of this situation, though everyone had been hoping that it wouldn't be needed. As Dr. Cox pushed a syringe needle into the vial, Carla burst into the room.

Dr. Cox glanced up only for a moment, shouting in doctor-mode, "Make sure he doesn't choke!" But Carla was already steadying the heart monitor and removing the breathing tube, since it could quite easily suffocate him as he tossed and turned, when Dr. Cox slipped the needle in JD's arm. There was a moment of tension as the unaware JD thrashed, then became still. Finally, he fell back, motionless and breathing lightly but surely.

Carla, after replacing several things, stood back trembling with wide eyes. She couldn't bring herself to make her hands stop shaking. Dr. Cox took a step away, blowing out through his mouth and lacing his fingers behind his head. JD lay limply, head to the side, skin deathly pale and hair flattened and sticking to his forehead with perspiration.

"Is he going to get better?" Carla finally whispered, still quivering. Dr. Cox stood beside and laid his hand on her shoulder.

He pushed the tremor out of his voice. "We'll try, Carla. We'll try."

The nurse left moments later, silent with her head hanging. Dr. Cox just kicked the door shut, making sure the blinds were down and collapsed into a chair. All day, Dr. Cox had been on the edge. He sighed, dropping his head exhaustedly with eyes sealed.

How many times had Dr. Cox seen patients with head injuries fade away, never waking till they had to pull the plug? How many times had he seen family and friends sob over a person and know that they'd never be able to talk or think again?

Dr. Cox fought angry tears now, angry that he couldn't save JD, angry that they weren't medically advanced enough to repair his brain, but mostly angry at himself. What if JD never woke up and Dr. Cox wouldn't ever be able to tell him that he was proud of him, and that he did care.

Suddenly, Dr. Cox heard a small sound, almost a whimper, not quite a moan. His head snapped up and his chest tightened. JD's eyes were opening slowly, the lids seemingly heavy.

"Newbie," Dr. Cox rasped, the word sounding like a statement rather than a question. JD looked towards the sound of the voice, though his eyes were unfocused and oddly blank.

Dr. Cox quickly, but gently removed the breathing tube, and JD coughed weakly. It didn't matter how long someone had one of those, it always left a throat dry and scratchy. The older doctor poured a small cup of water from a pitcher on a side table and offered it to JD. JD glanced down and blinked, not recognizing what he saw. Immediately, Dr. Cox felt his chest twist with worry. He lifted JD's head and brought the cup to his lips, slowly tipping it back so that the liquid brushed his skin. Immediately, JD's eyes shut and he drank out of instinct.

With the cup drained, Dr. Cox laid JD's head back onto the pillow. Dr. Cox pulled his hands back awkwardly before JD could notice, as much as he wanted to brush those heavy strands of hair from his face, weighted with product and sweat. But after several seconds of silence from JD, even though he was just waking up, it was quite unlike him to not speak.

"Hey there, Julie," Dr. Cox said, his relief drowning in worry. _He's such a smart kid, albeit a pain in the ass, but still, such a sweet kid, with real potential. Whoever or whatever above wouldn't let something like-like brain damage happen to Newbie of all people-_ "JD, a-are ya in there?"

Silence.

Suddenly panic welled and exploded in Dr. Cox's chest. He jumped to his feet and rushed out the door. When he came back, he was sure the kid would be better, that he would speak and recognize them all, that there'd be nothing wrong with his brain...

Turk sat with his head in his hands. Carla had just told them what happened, now that they all had a moment since lunch time rolled around. Elliot was sitting back in her seat miserably, staring into space. All of their plates were left untouched.

"Will he wake up?" Elliot finally asked. Turk shot up and glared furiously at her.

"Elliot!" he said angrily, "Don't even _think _like that. Of course he's going to wake up, and he's going to be fine." Carla looked as if he was going to say something when Dr. Cox approached their table. His arms were crossed and his gaze was half-lidded. Apparently, his walk from JD's room to the cafeteria had rid the confusion and worry from his body, leaving him feeling tired and defeated.

"Hey kiddies," he said, a bit too tame-sounding. All of their gazes came up, alarmed at the lack of relief, or even annoyance, in his tone. "Newbie's awake."

Turk scrambled up but Elliot was closer to the door and she led them out. Dr. Cox walked slowly behind the small group, struggling to find words to break the bad news. But it was too late, as he realized suddenly that they were already at the room.

"Wait, before you-" Dr. Cox tried, reaching out to pull Elliot back as she burst into the room.

There staring blankly at his hands, was JD, the white gauze around his head stark against his dark hair. As the four spilled into the room, he looked up slowly. His gray-blue eyes were still blank, though a slight confusion had entered them.

"JD!" Elliot shrieked, a huge grin spreading across her face. She swooped down and hugged his shoulders, head leaning against him. Carla was nearly to the point of tears in relief and Turk pushed past Dr. Cox in his haste. His mouth opened and closed several times, eyes misty, but he just laughed after a moment.

Elliot pulled away as Carla began stroking his head. "JD?" she asked, holding his arms and looking at him eye-level. "Are you okay?"

Suddenly Dr. Cox spoke. "I was trying to warn you, he hasn't said a word since he woke up."

JD was still silently staring around, eyes meek and blank, quite innocent-looking. Elliot stepped back, arms slipping from him. Turk's expression instantly changing from ecstatic to horrified. _Oh, no ... he can't have ... brain damage? _The awful notion entered the surgeon's head. _He's okay, he's just ... just... Oh, he has to get out of this okay!_

Then, out of nowhere, JD looked straight at Dr. Cox with Carla, Turk and Elliot following his gaze. His brow wrinkled in confusion, and his head tipped very slightly to one side, then a light burst into his eyes. "Perry!" he exclaimed as the word filled his mind. He didn't understand where it came from, or who any of the other people around him were, but something in his gut just told him that this man was to be called Perry.

Everyone blinked in shock. Turk actually looked hurt and he stepped forward. "JD, man, don't you recognize me?" Turk searched JD's eyes for any reorganization but there was nothing there, just innocent confusion.

For once, Dr. Cox felt a painful spurt of pity. He came forward, daring to rest a hand on Turk's shoulder. "He didn't recognize me when he woke up. That means he's remembering things," Dr. Cox pointed out quietly, "I'm sure he'll come to-"

Suddenly Turk Jerked away and rounded on him, eyes blazing angrily. "You've always been an ass to JD! Everyday, you treat him like crap and dump your problems on him like he's some sort a punching bag, while I've been his friend for _years_. Why should he recognize you, but not _me_?" Turk suddenly seemed too angry to continue, his muscles quivering in pent-up hate. Carla was at his side at once, and all it took was a hand on his shoulder for the anger to flow out of his frame, leaving him limp and hurt-looking.

Dr. Cox would never have admitted it but he felt stung that Turk saw him that way, not that he cared what Turk thought, but because he thought he'd done _something_ good to Newbie that was obvious. He had been watching over JD's shoulder since the beginning to make sure he didn't screw up anything, right? He gave him advice and helped him now and then, right?

But seeing how concerned Carla was and how much pain was in Turk's stance now, Dr. Cox bit his tongue and let the couple leave slowly.

Elliot was the only other one left. She looked up at Dr. Cox to say something, but she seemed to have lost her voice. After realizing JD's mind was damaged, she had the look of someone who'd just been smacked. Tears once again stung her eyes, and she stumbled out after Carla and Turk, arms hugging herself. Dr. Cox knew very well that both Turk and Elliot would seek out Carla's strength to lean on.

Now the room was empty, save for Dr. Cox, JD and the quiet whirring of medical equipment. JD looked up, eyes void of any dark emotions. In JD's current state, they seemed incapable of having anything like anger or hate. There was nothing but childlike confusion. His voice was weak and raspy as he called out to the only person he recognized in the world.

"Perry?"

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**so i know what's going to happen in the next couple of chapters but, uh, i'm not sure what the final predicament will end up being or about how it unfolds. i'm sure i'll figure it out eventually.**


	3. One Word

**so, i think i'll keep up the update every 3-4 days thing i'm doing. sound good, my lovely reader/reviewers?**

**Summary: **An accident befalls JD, and though all his basic memories like speaking, counting and even his ability as a doctor remains, all but one personal memory is lost, and only Dr. Cox can help him! Will JD ever be able to function properly again? Will he even ever remember who he is? And what's this rivalry between Cox and Turk[CoxJD

**Rating:** Um, I think it's rated T for now because of the blood, but since it's a CoxJD fanfic, who knows? Maybe I might have to bump up the rating later ...

Regular text.

"Speaking."

Thinking.

(Author's notes within story.)

_

* * *

_

_Chapter Three: One Word_

Perry felt bad as he left the hospital room, JD's blank eyes following him questioningly. He couldn't describe it, but felt as if he were abandoning a puppy in a big crowd. He could almost hear it whimper in his head. Then Perry scowled to himself. _I'm thinking like Newbie, dammit! _he thought with a characteristic growl.

His shift ended as the evening shift began. Perry weighed whether or not he should check up on Newbie, as Turk, Carla and Elliot had several times already. Then, with a self-hating growl, Perry turned into another hallway and hung by the door of JD's room.

Someone from the psychiatric ward was currently assessing JD. Perry felt an odd flare of anger, whether it was at himself, JD or this new guy, he wasn't sure, and he stomped into the room.

The tall, gangly man seemed to be reviewing his checklist one last time. "And do you recognize anyone?"

JD looked a tad frustrated, as if something were on the tip of his tongue but he couldn't quite grasp it, then he looked up at Perry. "Perry!" JD cried, eyes lighting up. The psychiatric guy looked up, blinking slowly. Perry instantly knew he wouldn't like this guy.

"Hello, Dr. ... Cox," he said, squinting at Perry's tag, then asked in a very professional way, "What is your relationship to John?"

Biting back a remark about how JD preferred to be called JD, Perry gave this stranger a classic 'I-don't-care-about-anything-you-say-or-do' glare as he spoke. "I'm his boss. So, I suppose you must know something about what you're doing. How is the ol' gal, Dr ... I don't care?"

The psychiatric doctor sniffed stiffly at Perry's rough manner before he spoke, "Well, JD seems to be in a partial fugue state. It doesn't seem permanent since he's been remembering bits and pieces all day, but I can't make any promises."

"Why?" Perry said in a dangerous, low tone. He always got straight to the point.

"As with all brain damage cases, we can't be sure as too the extent each patient can recover," he tried to explain, "There are some ways to help him along of course, we just need to locate people willing to devote the time. Does John have any close family or friends who might be willing?"

Perry wondered how this guy didn't know this already and also how he hadn't known who _the _Dr. Cox was. "Of course he does, though I doubt his brother will be much of a help. That kid's an idiot if there ever was one, but you could probably trust his little girlfriends," Perry said, irritated. Then his tone changed a bit, softened with a little concern. But just a bit. "So, how soon can he start these, uh, methods to help him remember?"

Fortunately, the psychiatric doctor seemed too stiffly formal to notice Perry's discomfort. "As soon as possible. He could even begin tomorrow." He paused, trailing off as he scribbled something down on his clipboard. Perry gave him a confused look, then saw what had triggered the sudden writing.

JD had stopped staring at Perry but rather had turned his attention to the closed window, where two sparrows where perched. They took turns pecking at something, probably a bug or a bit rubbish they'd picked up. JD seemed interested, gazing blankly with a small smile and Perry couldn't find the scorn to think of an insult. _In fact, it's a little cu- _Perry thought then cut himself off. _NO! I did not just think that. _

"Anyway," the now extremely annoying psychiatric doctor continued as he headed for the door, "If you could contact someone to talk to me tomorrow, that would be fine." Pushing a business card and a pamphlet on different therapies into Perry's hands, the other doctor left the room.

Sending an agitated glare after him, Perry glanced down at what he'd been given. _Dr. Gray? _Perry thought with a snort as he turned the business card over in his hand. _That's fitting._

"Dr. Cox?" came a feminine voice suddenly, tinged with an accent. It was Carla. "Who was that? And what are you doing here?"

Perry refused to show how embarrassed he was and covered it up by growling and speaking with scorn, not at Carla of course. She'd kick his butt. "That guy? Just some quack from the psychiatric ward. Said Newbie should start therapy or something tomorrow and someone needed to devote a lot of time to help him."

Carla seemed to remember that she had to work all day for the next two days because a saddened expression passed over her eyes, then she glanced up at Perry. A crafty gleam replaced the gloomy look.

"Dr. Cox, you're off tomorrow, aren't you?" she asked casually. Perry immediately gave a small laugh of disbelief.

"No, no, no! You can't possibly think that I'm going to give up my once-a-century off day where I can do whatever the hell I want just to help Gidget here out?" Perry ranted with a note of hysteria in his voice. Carla merely raised an eyebrow. "Oh no, you can't guilt me into this," he fumed as he stomped out the door, passing the papers into her hands. "You're strong Carla but you can't make me do this.

"I can't believe you got me to do this," Perry muttered in a half-growling, half-groaning tone. Carla gave him an irritated swat.

It was the next morning and, after a long lashing from Carla, Perry had been cowed into

"Well, I'm clocked all day for today and tomorrow, and Dr. Wen needs Turk until Todd recovers." She gave a shudder. "I have no idea how he could possibly eat for that long... And it was you who turned down Elliot's offer!"

Perry groaned as she brought the issue up again. "If I spent all day with Newbie _and _Barbie, I would have killed myself. But I can only _just _deal with Newbie now cause-" But Perry cut himself before the rest of that thought could roll off his tongue. Carla was glaring with enough venom to kill and he knew she'd figured out what he was going to say.

After a few moments of silence from him, Carla nodding as she walked off from the nurses' station, "Now that's what I thought. JD should be ready to go by his room so hurry up and head over there, alright?"

She didn't really wait for an answer as Perry pushed from the counter as well and sighed. _I don't even know what I'm supposed to do, _he thought irately as the door came into sight. There was JD, sitting with his knees to his chest by the door. He'd been redressed into his street clothes, causing to Perry to raise an eyebrow. JD was fiddling idly with his shoelace, that all-too-familiar blank look in his eyes.

Standing over JD, was Dr. Gray, who looked a tad anxious, clutching a clipboard to his chest. Upon seeing Dr. Cox, he gave a little jump then looked slightly relieved.

"Ah, Dr. Cox, I see you're the one who is going to help John today?" The psychiatric doctor asked cordially. Perry merely nodded, glaring. Dr. Gray gave an uncomfortable cough and continued. "Well, first of all I need you to sign a few things. I know I can trust a fellow doctor with a patient but this is required ..."

Perry snatched up the clipboard, plucking a pen from his coat pocket. Knowing better than to sign without reading, he glanced over the papers. It simply said that if JD were to be injured while under the care of Dr. Cox, his current psychiatric physician couldn't be held responsible.

The very notion that they thought he might hurt JD made Perry growl indignantly. He was a doctor for god's sake! And Newbie was his ... his what exactly? Perry thought this over for a second. His apprentice? His friend? A son-like figure? But he shook off his confusion and scribbled his signature down, passing the clipboard back.

Dr. Gray gave an unsure pause before speaking, "Well now, there are several things you can do to help John-"

"JD," Perry finally rasped, "Everyone calls him JD."

"Right," Dr. Gray replied, "There are several ways you can help JD. The first thing most people do is simple go around the patients most frequented places, like their house, a store that they go by often or even a park. Seeing familiar objects and places will help 'spark' his memory, so to speak."

Perry nodded, already irritated, "And then what?"

Once again, Dr. Gray looked miffed by his attitude, but answered anyway. "Then you bring the patient back here so I can assess his progress. Now, before you leave, be sure to take this, and this, just in case. And ... That should do it! Good luck, and take care. Remember, JD will need you to guide him wherever you go.

Giving an inward groan as Dr. Gray sped off toward the psychiatric ward, Perry looked over the paper he now had. It had a short list of symptoms JD might experience and he needed to watch out for. But Perry was already aware of most of them, so he folded up the paper and shoved it into his pocket before looking down at JD. JD looked up slowly to meet Perry's stare and smiled childishly.

"Come on, JD, it's time to go," Perry said as he pulled JD to his feet. "Just, follow ,e, 'kay kid?" He flashed JD a small, comforting smile but JD just blinked and cocked his head to the side. Perry resisted the urge to groan. _This is going to be a long day._

_

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_

**i was actually planning to a lot more in this chater but the part with stuffy dr. gray lasted so long ... i suppose the next chapter will be, oh, what do you fanfic people call? fluffy?**


	4. Puppies and Butterflies

**agh, there so much pressure for this fluff thing! everyone's like 'yay, can't wait for fluff' and i don't know if my fluff will be up to fluff standards. well, enjoy!**

**Summary: **An accident befalls JD, and though all his basic memories like speaking, counting and even his ability as a doctor remains, all but one personal memory is lost, and only Dr. Cox can help him! Will JD ever be able to function properly again? Will he even ever remember who he is? And what's this rivalry between Cox and Turk?

**Rating:** Um, I think it's rated T for now because of the blood, but since it's a CoxJD fanfic, who knows? Maybe I might have to bump up the rating later ...

**Song of the chapter**: (yes, this is new!) 'All The Same' by _Sick Puppies_, imagine the song from Perry's point of view.

Regular text.

"Speaking."

Thinking.

(Author's notes within story.)

_

* * *

__Chapter Four: Puppies and Butterflies, For God's Sake_

JD gazed attentively out the car window and images raced past. He sat with his arms against the car door, head turning every now and then to follow something as it appeared and vanished. Perry, who was driving, had gotten over the uncomfortable first few minutes. His method with about everything was stay prickly enough to keep everything out but with JD in his current condition, it just wasn't right to be prickly.

They pulled into a parking lot beside JD's apartment building. Perry stepped out stiffly with car keys in hand before going over to the passenger's side and opening JD's door. JD blinked up at him blankly.

"Remember anything yet?" the older doctor asked. JD remained silent, simply smiling at the only person he just barely recognized. "I'll take that as a no." Perry reached over JD and unbuckled him, seeing as JD couldn't or wouldn't do it himself. To his surprise, Perry felt JD tense up as he leaned over to reach the buckle.

As the seat belt whipped away automatically, Perry stepped away uncomfortably. He'd felt JD's breath on his ear and he didn't like the feeling it gave him. After a quick shake, Perry pulled JD to his feet once more and led him inside, and JD followed quietly without question.

After a few flights of stairs that left JD with a bit of confusion in his eyes, Perry walked straight up to his apartment. It kind of bothered him that he should know so much about an insignificant peon like Newbie but he entered the room, all the same.

JD walked in slowly, almost in wonder, gazing about with a furrowed brow. It was his apartment, though he didn't know. He went to the couch and ran his hand over the back of it, then walked by Rowdy, gently brushing his fingertips over the stuffed dog as he passed it.

Standing a little ways back, Perry let JD explore the room he'd been living in for years. JD didn't seemed surprised but more soaking in the details. Perry was leaning against the wall, arms crossed, head down, when JD's voice suddenly shocked him awake.

"Rowdy!"

Perry blinked up at JD, who was now crouched before the stuffed dead dog, eyes glowing with recognition. As had happened before, the word swelled in JD's mind till he was sure that this oddly familiar object was to be called 'Rowdy'. Perry let a small smile grow on his lips, knowing that no one would see it, as he thought how angry Turk would get that JD's ass of a mentor and his dead stuffed dog were recognized before him.

After a few moments, JD left his investigating and returned to his mentor. He stood before Perry with a blank smile, stepping from foot to foot, as if eager to continue looking somewhere else.

Suddenly he seized Perry's hand, grinning, and began pulling him out of the apartment. "C'mon Perry!" Perry allowed himself to directed purely out of shock then he realized suddenly that JD was improving, not in the order he'd imagined, but improving nonetheless.

After getting into the hall, Perry removed his hand from Newbie's grip and led him back down the stairs. JD cast a glance back towards the apartment but Perry couldn't discern his expression. Once back to the car, Perry opened the passenger door and pushed JD in gently. JD seemed to get it this time, and promptly sat down. He still didn't get the seat belt though, and Perry felt an odd sort of dread as he gripped the buckle and leaned over.

JD became tense as Perry's footing faltered and he became unbalanced. For two infinitely long seconds, Perry leaned on JD's chest and placed his hand on forward instinctively to stop his descent ... right on JD's upper leg. JD's eyes flashed with something like alarm and his hands came up, but Perry had already buckled JD in and returned to his feet.

Smoothing his ruffled shirt, Perry closed the car door and went around to the driver's side. He glanced around self-consciously, just to see if anyone had witnessed the small incident, before climbing in and driving the car onto the road again.

Perry looked over at JD once they hit the mainstream and was oddly hurt to see how shaken he was. JD gave him a blinking stare, eyes shocked and maybe even a little hurt. Feeling his instinctively response to most anything, Perry felt his anger tempered with a slight bit of guilt.

Those first few uncomfortable minutes smoothed over and JD's body became less tense. Eventually, his blank smile came back and he leaned against the door, gazing at the world flying by.

After a bit of thought, Perry decided to listen to that psychiatric doctor's suggestion and headed for the park. It was little more than a green, grassy stretch with a large pond and a trail ringed with trees. But, as Perry pulled into the little parking lot beside it, he saw several groups of people, like kids with their mothers, pairs of teens strolling hand in hand and even an old couple tossing bits of bread to pigeons.

He scoped out the groups for a moment to see if there was anyone he knew but there was no one, so Perry climbed out of his car and retrieved JD from the passenger's side. JD stepped out slowly, sniffing the air with blinking blue eyes. Wondering what he was smelling, Perry looked around then realized he could feel moisture in the air, and smell it too. The scent of approaching rain.

Just over the trees, beyond the small lake, gray clouds could be seen rolling closer slowly. Perry guessed it would be a few hours till the storm arrived and, since it was still quite warm and sunny here, decided to bring JD out for a bit.

First, JD just stood like a newborn fawn, blinking and grinning childishly till Perry led him to the grass. Beside the pond, the soil was fertile and several bright flowers bloomed. A butterfly or two fluttered from blossom to blossom and JD stared in wonder before following and attempting to touch their dazzling wings.

Perry followed silently, just making sure that JD didn't get hurt when suddenly he heard a bout of unrestrained laughter. JD had sat down in the grass with a butterfly, an orange and black one, lighting down onto his outstretched hand. Perry rolled his eyes at how girly he could possibly be but had to admit to himself, he liked how innocently happy JD was. No fear plaguing his mind, no anger or hate ruining his heart, just happy to marvel at the tiny miracle the now fluttered on his hand.

"See, Perry?" JD asked, lifting his arm for him to see. Perry watched as the butterfly, disturbed by the movement, flew off.

"Yeah," Perry replied gruffly, giving in and sitting beside him. "I see."

For the next hour or so, JD drifted from one part of the park to another, stopping every now and then to gaze at something. Perry glanced up at the sky to keep an eye on the approaching storm. He didn't want to get caught in the rain because, though many people were unaware, Perry hated being wet. He couldn't stand his clothes clinging to his skin once he got inside somewhere dry and how things like crumbs and whatnot stuck to his body as well.

As Perry considered how much he disliked things sticking to him, someone's voice jerked him out of his thoughts. The sound of JD laughing and a small dog's bark accompanied the feminine tone.

"Is he your son?" A short, small woman asked. Perry instantly felt a liking for her and didn't know if it was the intelligent, kind glint in her eyes or the way she stood so confidently. In her hand was the end of a leash. On the other end was a small white dog that was currently bouncing about JD's lap and licking his face.

Perry felt a surge of embarrassment but he covered it quickly by bringing up his mask of indifference. "Well, sort of. His real dad's dead."

"Oh," she said, standing beside him as her dog continued to scuffle and wriggle in JD's arms. "Is he alright?"

"No, actually. He hit his head, if you can believe it or not, and has yet to recover his memory." Perry replied bluntly. He felt no need to soften the truth with this stranger, knowing in his gut that she wouldn't make a big deal about it.

There were a few moments of silence between the two as JD flopped onto his back in the grass and let the white-furred canine slobber over his face with shrieks of unrepressed laughter. Finally, the woman shifted her weight and gave a wry smile.

"You know," she started and Perry looked at her with slowly blinking eyes, "I got my son that dog and this kid has paid more attention to it in the last ten minutes then he has in the past year we've had her." Then she looked up at the sky and murmured quietly, "It's going to rain real soon."

After gently extricating the small dog from JD, she left the pair of doctors, though one slightly out of it, and went back into the city with a goodbye tossed over her shoulder with the turn of her head. Perry smelled the air again and noticed how much thicker it felt with the oncoming rain.

_Funny_, he thought as he helped JD to his feet. _It's like some sort of _disaster _is about to happen and this thick air is the foreboding embodied._

As Perry opened the car door, he felt that dread again and made sure for several seconds that his footing was absolute before leading JD in and reaching over with buckle in hand. He didn't pull away as soon as it clicked into place though, because something felt different, almost wrong. JD didn't tense up as he usually did. Perry leaned out to see the reason why.

JD's head was lolled to the side, his eyes barely open and a dreamy smile on his face. It took Perry a moment to realize the kid was almost asleep.

"Playin' with puppies and butterflies _really _took it out of ya, didn't it?" he muttered sarcastically but JD didn't even notice the bite to his voice. He merely woke up and tensed as he realized Perry was leaned over him but relaxed as his mentor backed away and closed the door. Perry walked around to the other side slowly, reflecting on the now gray sky and his relationship to JD. He'd said he was his boss to Dr. Gray and that he was like a father to JD when that lady asked but if he was mentor-type figure, why did his heart tighten in his chest with dreadful anticipation every time he buckled JD's seatbelt? What sort of tension was it that spread through their limbs whenever their skin brushed?

The door seemed to have appeared suddenly once Perry reached the driver's side and climbed in. Glancing once at JD to make sure he was alright, the older man pulled out his keys and turned them in the ignition slot.

The engine turned once and fell silent, refusing to start, just as the rain began to pour.

* * *

**big things are gonna happen next chapter! what with the rain and the car not working and stuff. i'm not sure how long it'll be but we'll see once i start writing again...**


	5. A Stroll Through the Rain

**oh, how i torture poor perry but i threw in a fun little twist here. as JD will soon say, what can go wrong?**

**Summary: **An accident befalls JD, and though all his basic memories like speaking, counting and even his ability as a doctor remains, all but one personal memory is lost, and only Dr. Cox can help him! Will JD ever be able to function properly again? Will he even ever remember who he is? And what's this rivalry between Cox and Turk?

**Rating:** Um, I think it's rated T for now because of the blood, but since it's a CoxJD fanfic, who knows? Maybe I might have to bump up the rating later ...

**Song of the chapter**: none for this chapter. maybe it was a one time thing...

Regular text.

"Speaking."

Thinking.

(Author's notes within story.)

* * *

_Chapter Five: A Stroll Through the Rain_

Perry cursed under his breath, slamming his fist against the steering wheel as he attempted to start the car one last time. The engine didn't even give a sound. With a vicious growl, Perry looked up through the windshield and saw the rain really beginning to pour but, with no car, they had no choice but to walk anyway.

After fishing through the contents on the floor of the backseat, Perry located a jacket with a hood. He glanced from the jacket to JD to the jacket again then sighed and dropped it in the oblivious man's lap. He then climbed out of the car and almost instantly became soaked as he worked his way around to the passenger's side.

JD stared up at Perry with his gray eyes blank as ever and didn't protest when Perry pulled him into the ran. He did, however, shake his head and wipe his face as rain ran down his forehead into his eyes. Perry rolled his eyes and grabbed the jacket that he'd planned to wear but helped JD into instead.

"C'mon, Newbie. It's a long walk," Perry said, holding JD by the wrist and leading him onto the city sidewalk. A roll of thunder boomed overhead and JD jumped in fright, clinging to Perry's arm with a whimper. Surprisingly, Perry couldn't find it in himself to be angry or even annoyed and just continued walking through the silver mist thrown up by the rain.

As they came to an intersection, Perry glanced up at the street signs and growled. _It's at least ten blocks to my apartment, and fifteen to the hospital_, Perry thought, frowning, _I don't know how long JD can hold out. _As Perry looked at the younger man shivering and the absolutely deserted street, he resolved to just plow through it and if JD couldn't make it, well, he'd just have to carry him, wouldn't he?

Another blast of thunder roared, this time closer, and immediately afterwards Perry saw a forked streak of white light flash in the dark clouds. JD froze, staring where the lightning had appeared and vanished before blinking water out of his eyes.

"Newbie, you alright?" Perry said, prodding him in the ribs with his elbow. JD then relaxed, as if being released by vision, and blinked at Perry. Perry beat down that flare of hope in his chest that maybe JD had gotten his memory back, vaguely feeling that he shouldn't feel so involved with someone who supposedly bothered him so much.

But countering that hope was an odd fear. Would there ever be another moment where it would be okay for JD to walk down the street holding Perry's arm? Would JD have ever wanted to hold Perry's arm if he'd been in his right mind? Suddenly Perry blinked his eyes wide as these thoughts passed through his head. _What? What?! I'm not thinking this. Why am I thinking this? Why should I care whether or not it would be socially acceptable for me and Newbie to hang out without my emotional barrier of anger?_

"But it wouldn't matter if I called you Martha or Newbie or even JD right now. You wouldn't remember it when you got your memory back," Perry mused. JD just blinked blankly and Perry noticed how odd JD looked with his hair soaked flat. "So this-" he continued, motioning to how JD clutched his arm, "-never happens again? I mean, your friends wouldn't mind seeing just how much of a girl you are but this would ruin me. And those nurses would just start gossiping away about how Dr. Cox has gone soft." Perry knew that wouldn't be the only things they'd gossip about.

Suddenly there was a brilliant flash of light, effectively blinding Perry for a full three seconds as lightning struck a telephone pole. Thunder crashed in the air around them and sparks rained from the cables. Perry, covering his face with his hands, grabbed JD and pulled him several feet away, onto the street, seeing as he wasn't doing anything thing to protect himself from getting burned. It was all over in a few seconds, though Perry noticed that lights were going out in windows everywhere.

It was just after this that JD was suddenly wrenched from his grasp. The rainwater had gathered like rivers at the sides of the street, effectively knocking the smaller, clumsier JD off his feet.

Perry's eyes widened, heart racing from the adrenaline rush that wanted him to save JD. JD was sprawled, eyes sealed, on the street, shivering thoroughly, as the stream parted around him. Perry pulled him to into a sitting position, keeping a firm grip on him this time, and crouched beside him. He shook his shoulder with his teeth grinding in worry. _You gotta be kidding me. He already hit his head once and now he's cracked his skull on the street! JD, c'mon JD, don't do this-_

His eyelids fluttered and a rasping groan left his throat. For a moment, he looked around, brow knitted in confusion, then he looked up at Perry and his eyes blinked wide. "Did you-" he stuttered, "Did you just call me by my name?"

_What? Is he losing his mind? _Perry thought, still kneeling in the water on the curb. "No, why?"

JD stood up shakily, still obviously confused by his surroundings. "I'm not losing my mind," he said a tad indignantly, then answered his mentor's question, "Because I heard you say, 'JD, c'mon JD, don't do this.'"

By the time they reached the hospital, Perry had filled JD in on the details, such as why he was fifteen blocks from the hospital in the rain with Dr. Cox and why it was Tuesday afternoon rather than Monday morning, which was the last time JD remembered. Occasionally, JD would look at him strangely when he thought worriedly if JD remembered or would later remember what he'd said.

"So you're saying that the Janitor 'accidentally' tripped me," JD said as they approached the front steps, putting quotation marks around accidentally, "And I lost my memory for a day and a half. And it was you who volunteered to help me get it back?"

Perry rolled his eyes with a growl. "If there had been anyone else available, I promise you, I'd have been out of here but there wasn't, and the longer therapy is help off, the less of a chance someone's memory can be recovered. Carla would have killed me if I'd held off and ended up causing damage by not doing anything."

JD's eyes flickered as he sensed something odd from Perry, like he could feel a lie, or hesitation of some sort, but he shook off the sensation and looked down as he climbed the steps. Then he gave a small laugh.

"God, we are soaked!" JD exclaimed and shook his head, sending water drops flying from his hair. Perry raised his hand halfheartedly to block them, already well aware that they were wet by the way his clothes clung to his skin uncomfortably. Suddenly, there was a blur to his left and someone smacked his head. Responding in true Dr. Cox fashion, he whirled around to meet this person with a snarl and one or two swear words.

It was Carla, tight-lipped in anger. "What is the matter with you?" she demanded with a prod in the chest, before Perry could get a word in. "You have been gone for almost five hours with a defenseless JD and not a single return from your pager _or _cell phone."

Instinctively, Perry felt his back pockets to find both items missing. _Must've left the damned things in the car_, he thought with a groan. "Sorry Carla, ran out of gas and I forgot'em. Plus, I have more bad news."

"What?" Carla said, eyes wide.

"Our favorite gal got her memory back," Perry said as he pulled JD to stand in front of him. JD smiled with his teeth and blinked.

Carla poked him hard in the chest as well. As JD yelped and rubbed the now-forming bruise, Carla ranted in an odd mix of fury and relief, "How dare you make us to worry so much, JD! I hope you have a very good explanation for causing this much trouble because if you don't, I'm going to hit so hard-"

"Carla, whoa," JD said, holding his hands up in a placating manner, "Does losing all my memory and taking a blow of solid concrete to the head count? I'm sorry I made you worry so much, but you know, the car not working when it's already a forty-five minute drive in the first place really slowed us down." JD gave a slightly sheepish grin. "Plus, I nearly got struck by lightning and I slipped and knocked my noggin on pavement." JD ruffled the hair on the side of his head to show where the skin was broken.

In a heartbeat, Carla's expression changed from furious to concerned. She took JD by the hand and shot Perry a look of pure venom as she led him away. "How could you let JD hit his head _again _when you were supposed to be helping him with therapy?" she accused and left with JD smiling and giving him a sympathetic look.

Perry stood speechless as the past day went through his mind: letting JD cling to his arm in public, driving like, an hour to the park, running out of gas, walking through the friggin' rain that he despised so, and now Carla was accusing him of _not _trying?

"It's okay, Dr. Cox," JD called from the hallway, voice fading as Carla pulled him farther and farther away, "_I_ know you tried hard to help me."

Only able to stare in horror as one or two heads turned, Perry realized two unbearable things at once: first of all, JD seemed to be able to read his mind, if not all minds and secondly, he and now several others now thought that he had voluntarily _helped _him. This day was not going so hot.


	6. Dilemma of the Heart

**yeah, so i'm drowning under all my work, and i just barely passed my midterm. lord... but i do give you permission to throw rotten fruit for not updating in, like, months. that's my fault. Really. **

**Summary: **An accident befalls JD, and though all his basic memories like speaking, counting and even his ability as a doctor remains, all but one personal memory is lost, and only Dr. Cox can help him! Will JD ever be able to function properly again? Will he even ever remember who he is? And what's this rivalry between Cox and Turk?

**Rating:** For this chapter? I don't know, it's a little intense. T maybe. Yeah, that goes for the whole story. You'll like the ending. -grins- I promise.

Regular text.

"Speaking."

_Thinking._

(Author's notes within story.)

_

* * *

_

_Chapter Six: Dilemma of the Heart_

The very next day, things seemed to be going wrong. JD was shadowing Perry as a precaution when he suddenly stopped and rubbed his head. Now that Perry paused to tell JD to pick up the pace, he noticed that he'd broke out in a cold sweat. Red flags went up in his head.

JD's knuckles whitened as he gripped the chart tight and pushed his forehead into his hand, gritting his teeth against the pain. Perry's voice came distorted and hazy, forcing him to blink and look forward.

"Hey, Newbie, can you hear me in there?" Dr. Cox growled, though his heart had jumped up a few speeds. JD had kept a lid on about his apparently new ability for some reason that had eluded Perry. Maybe this had something to do with JD's odd behavior.

"Yes, Dr. Cox," JD gasped finally, "Loud and clear."

Perry knew trouble when he heard it so he spun around, giving up on trying to finish anything when Newbie was acting like a little girl. "Alright Priscilla, tell me what's going on because if you do another face-plant on my time, I'm not picking you up again."

Willpower being thoroughly beaten, JD began to quiver slightly. "Oh, it's nothing really, just this headache's been getting worse." 'Worse' was an understatement. It felt as if something had sank its claws into his skull and was in the process of ripping it apart. Dr. Cox gave an exasperated rasp and felt the JD's forehead with the back of his hand. _Great, a fever_, Dr. Cox thought. _He's already back out of commission_.

"No! I can keep going, really," JD protested, even though he hadn't said anything, but a sway betrayed his words. "Please, trust me."

Perry snorted derisively. "Not when you're in this condition," he said, pulling the clipboard from his hands. "Go sleep in the on-call room. Oh, and try to figure out what's wrong with you, okay? Make my life a little easier."

JD looked a little confused as Perry sped off in the opposite direction because while he'd growled in annoyance, he was sure he'd heard, 'Geez, this kid's gonna give me gray hair if he keeps worrying me like this.' But regardless, JD struggled to make it to the on-call room, brushing past Carla on the way, who simply had to stop him.

"Bambi, you look a little pale," she clucked in that mother hen-ly way of hers, "Are you sick?" JD refused to let her worry like he'd done earlier by revealing the actually severity of what he had now dubbed his super migraine.

"Ah, no, it's nothing, just a bit of a headache," JD soothed instantly, "Dr. Cox said I should sit out for a minute."

Carla's eyes widened in obvious worry and she patted his shoulder as she spoke. "Oh, JD, I told you not to push yourself and now look what you've done? Go sleep and I'll grab you something for that headache."

JD just nodded, hardly able to hear above that horrid buzzing-humming noise in his head, and staggered into the welcoming darkness of the on-call room. He didn't glance at the bed before collapsing heavily with a rough groan. The pain had started the night before as nothing more than a cross-sensation between tingling and whispering in his head but was now building into a massive brain-explosion. When Carla reappeared with ibuprofen, he realized that he wasn't thinking straight at all. He was in a friggen' hospital, he should have just dropped by the nurses' station earlier for a pain killer or something.

But, JD lay shivering in the stiff bed, praying for the bliss of unconsciousness, curled on his side with his jaw clenched. Carla had not seen him assume this position, since he didn't want her to worry, and had waited till the moment after she'd left to twist over and squeeze his head in his hands with a whimper. JD didn't even have time to think about what Dr. Cox would do if he found JD passed out and feverish in the on-call room before that wonderful thing called sleep claimed JD's mind.

It was a half-hour or so later when Perry reappeared, opening the door to find JD trembling on the bed, fever spiked and breaking out in a sweat. Perry struggled between admitting JD into the hospital or taking this as one of the after-affects of his condition from yesterday. Finally, after a small self-conflict, Perry flicked on the light, shut the door and sat at the foot of the newly ill JD's bed.

The movement seemed to spark JD in his hypersensitive state of fever. He glanced up sharply and tried to focus of Perry, nearly panicking at the sudden, severe decrease in his health.

"Dr. Cox?" JD ventured, the sound in his head nearly unbearable. "What are you doing here?"

Perry rolled his eyes. "Just making sure you don't die, Newbie. They said a feverish state could follow what happened yesterday and I'm just making sure that if it you break 103, someone can get you to the emergency room. Now here, take these."

He handed JD a pair of pills to help cool him down and JD was thankful, for the others Carla had given him had worn off already. He mumbled something to Perry before laying back down. Briefly, JD wondered how much more he could take before he started screaming when he finally fell asleep once more.

Within his dream, JD felt warm but not uncomfortably so. He seemed to be laying on a bed because he was sure it was something soft. His senses were fogged at least, and when he cracked his eyes open a bit see, he could barely see past the shadows. JD let his awareness fall again, settling back onto that warmth that he now realized wasn't a bed. Just before he slipped into dreamless sleep, he recognized it from when he'd fallen on the street during the rain and Perry had held him to his chest...

The dreamless sleep didn't last. Soon, thoughts and images flickered past his mind's eye but JD didn't recognize them; they weren't his own. For a moment, Turk's emotions filtered through and he seemed to be at the end of a surgery, limp with disappointment. Then, there was Carla, a thousand thoughts flying through her head at once as she imbedded all the details for each patient into her mind. What did this patient need? Who did she need to call for her? What meds should she be picking up?

After a few more familiar, individual people, there was a painful blur of patient's and doctor's thoughts, emotions and sights that piled on more and more people's thoughts at once. JD squirmed in his sleep, mouth open for breath, mumbling worriedly.

Perry hesitated for a heartbeat, then sat beside JD's head, pulling one leg onto the bed and letting his other hang over the side. JD had curled onto his side on the far edge, shivering, and Perry felt his forehead again. It wasn't high enough for him to be rushed to the ER but if he didn't improve in the next half-hour...

Suddenly, JD rolled over and rested his head against Perry's side, halfway on his ribs and halfway on his stomach, and settled his hand on the older man's knee. Tension rippled over Perry's muscles and Perry fought between gently removing himself and remaining where he sat.

Finally, he relaxed resignedly and looked upward for relief from how uncomfortable he was. Not physically of course. In fact, he kind of liked the situation, but that was the problem. He shouldn't like the situation and that was causing conflict between his logic and his heart. _What should I do?_ he thought in the deepest, darkest corner of his mind, wanting to wail in despair. _It won't work, it wouldn't work but why won't my heart stop trying? This is it. This is it._ And despite himself, in that dark on-call room, a warm tear escaped his shield and rolled down his weathered cheek, before vanishing into the shadows.

But JD felt it, maybe not on his skin, but he was wide awake when his heart quivered with Perry's thoughts and emotions and he found his own mind reflecting it. _It's over?_ he thought silently as sleep recaptured him. _It can't be over..._

_

* * *

_

That was angsty. I'm update again soon, I promise. I really like this story.


	7. Delayed Reaction

**Holy effing eff, I updated. I'd be excited but now we have to worry about the plagues and the four horsemen of death (go me, quoting House on a Scrubs fic. That takes skill.)**

**Summary**: An accident befalls JD, and though all his basic memories like speaking, counting and even his ability as a doctor remains, all but one personal memory is lost, and only Dr. Cox can help him! Will JD ever be able to function properly again? Will he even ever remember who he is? And what's this rivalry between Cox and Turk[CoxJD

**Rating**: Um, I think it's rated T for now because of the blood, but since it's a CoxJD fanfic, who knows? Maybe I might have to bump up the rating later ...

Regular text.

"Speaking."

_Thinking_.

(Author's notes within story.)

* * *

_Chapter Seven: Delayed Reaction_

It was dark and quiet. Perry didn't know where he was, but he liked it. Someone was against him, someone he liked. Perry smiled against their skin and felt them wrap their arms around him. A name formed unbidden on his lips.

"JD… "

"Mm, what?"

Perry leapt out of bed. A dream. It was just a dream. Oh. He looked back at the bed to see JD slowly waking up, apparently responding to the sound of his name. He blinked sleepily up at Perry, smiling, and gave a little wave.

"Jesus, what time is it?" Perry muttered and pressed to light button on his watch. Past eight. Carla must've arranged it so no one bothered them, knowing they both needed some rest.

What she hadn't been aware of was that that rest had been in the same bed.

JD sat up, a smile plastered to his face. "Ah, I feel great!" He rubbed his head. Not a single voice. He looked to Perry, then back to the bed, and frowned. "Why were we in the same bed?"

"If you know what's good for you, Newbie, we weren't." The implied threat made JD draw back. For some reason though, the younger doctor didn't quite grasp the threat. There was a twist of emotion under the prickliness that JD sensed, and it wasn't anger. In fact, it was easy to tell what Perry was feeling, as easy as seeing. Perhaps a remnant of his temporary ability.

"Ah, okay, Dr. Cox. Whatever you say." They stared at each other, tension palpable in the air. Tension Perry craved too much to stand. He headed for the door.

"Geez, I can't believe I wasted my afternoon in-" Perry stopped dead. Twisting the door knob, he tensed. It wouldn't budge. Frantically, he turned it harder and yanked. No wonder no one had bothered them- it was locked. Perry kicked the door, which rattled, but remained obstinately unopened. "Damn door!"

JD got up and swayed. Instinctively, Perry clasped his arm and steadied him, then pulled away as if burned. That was way too close…

"What, we're stuck in here?" JD tried the door himself, not as violently though. "Crap!" he exclaimed, then gave a little laugh. "What will the nurses think when they let us out in the morning?"

Perry paled. Oh no, no, no, the nurses would not be letting them out in the morning. He didn't think he could stand a night alone with his own personal Newbie, and even if he did resist either: a) strangling him, or b) … something more tempting at the moment, then the rumors would still be like a bad rash- annoying and persistent. He pressed his face to the long window, cupping his hands against the light. He would have to find someone trustworthy to call over and let them out.

He patted his pockets and found his cell phone- which was dead. After the rain incident, he'd left it in the car overnight and its sad, sad little battery life hadn't made it through the day without a charge. Perry turned to JD, who in turn examined his pockets- he didn't have his cell phone with him.

"This is ridiculous!" Perry exclaimed and looked back out the little window. Maybe two people had gone by in the past five minutes, both nurses. Not the kind of person who needed to be letting the infamous Dr. Cox and his protégé JD out of a locked on-call room.

They waited. Finding someone trustworthy was more difficult than he thought. Once, the Janitor had walked by, but it was JD who jumped up and the man promptly kept walking. Perry swore to beat him over the head with a variety of janitorial objects afterwards. None of Newbie's little girlfriends walked by. They were either home or too busy to stop by the on-call room.

Eventually, Perry sat down on the cot next to JD. Worse came to worse, he would punch through the little window and open the door from the outside. Anything was better than being discovered in the morning. JD looked sideways at him, unsure of what to say to his agitated mentor. He took a breath to speak and Perry interrupted him.

"Don't even think about it, Newbie." To his surprise, JD narrowed his eyes, emanating anger. It was strangely powerful, but Perry didn't let his surprise show.

JD stood up and moved across the room. It was literally painful- the contradiction of Perry's outer action and inner emotion. Without thinking, JD muttered, "Why don't you just tell me how you really feel."

Many people would grant that Perry was not the calmest person, or that he contained rage or even annoyance well. He worked his ass off almost everyday and therefore felt that he had the right to yell at people when it appealed to him then go home and watch his sports and drink his scotch. Now was one of those appealing moments, though a quiet, scalding voice was more effective than a senseless, yelling rage.

"Look here, Newbie, I didn't ask to deal with you. Carla is someone that I would say I have a vague emotion for that is something other than annoyance, and I did her a favor. Don't think that means anything more than it does, because it doesn't." He then twisted the metaphorical knife where it hurt most. "Had anyone else asked, I wouldn't have done it. To tell you the truth, Scarlet, I don't care about you. I really don't. Now be a good little girl and leave me alone."

JD was silent, recoiling from the stinging remark. It really hurt- both the words and the now-major inner/outer contradiction. In fact, it was giving him a headache.

A headache. He had to take some sort of action _now_. Like a dog traumatized after being hit by a truck, the sound of the headache's engine spurred JD to stand up for himself and fix the unnatural opposition in Perry's head.

"No, you look-"

"Oh, here we go. Mariska's gonna throw a hissy."

JD glared silently, the emanating anger intensifying. Perry felt the pressure of it now, and felt the slightest regret. So this was what it was like to fear Newbie.

"Dr. Cox," JD said calmly. The shift in tone was so surprising that Perry didn't interrupt him. "I don't like this situation any more than you. It's confusing, aggravating and painful, but we can't lie to ourselves." JD flinched at the notion. It actually hurt. "I admit there's something weird going on and I can sense it in you, too." JD got up and walked towards Perry. Perry leaned back, so confused at the power change that he was speechless. JD stopped just inches in front of the older doctor. "So look me in the eye, and _tell me the truth_."

Perry didn't tell JD the truth. He slowly brought his hands to JD's head and pulled him down, and kissed him. JD went rigid in surprise, then went with it. His headache was melting away. Perry's inner and outer selves were coinciding and it felt great- almost as great as what was happening. Perry breathed harder and pulled JD down, gripping his arms and pressing forward.

"Hello?" The door rattled. "Anyone in there?" With the lights out, the intern couldn't see in the room. Perry leapt up and knocked back on the door.

"Hey! Let me out!" It swung open and Perry brushed passed the confused young man. Leaving JD where he sat, Perry strode down the hall, into the elevator, out the front doors and to his car, all the while his mind whirling. That did not just happen, that did _not _just happen...

Perry went home and went straight for the scotch. He needed some serious mind-numbing sports and alcohol. That did not just happen...

He touched his lips when he finally sat down. JD had just been there, just moment ago... The roar of the TV couldn't compete with the dark, quiet room in Perry's head, where someone Perry liked was against him. His mind whirled and the scotch only made it more chaotic. That did not just happen…

He fell back and stared at the ceiling, suddenly extremely aware. The unthinkable had just happened, and no matter what he told himself, he wanted more.

* * *

**Whoooo! Go me! I updated, oh yeah! XD Ok, now EIGHTY of you have this story on your alert list- i expected at least a few reviews. It's only fair. I hope to update when i get back next week but you know me. I don't update. Like, ever. But i will, according to the response I get from this chappie! I love you, readers.**


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